


A different world

by spinhell



Category: Popee the Performer (Anime)
Genre: Character Death In Dream, F/M, Immortality, Love ?, Suicidal Ideation, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, dream - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:01:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25677778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spinhell/pseuds/spinhell
Summary: Popee and Eepop can meet again through dreams, each idealizes death and dreams of tasting it. Unfortunately they are immortal and can only die temporary, but what if dying in a dream allows them to finally achieve their goal?
Relationships: Popee/Mirror Popee (Popee the Performer)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	A different world

He could hear everything, but dare not open his eyes. 

The screams, the mocking laughters, the hoot… this was an indecent song that invaded Popee's ears but it also meant something : Popee missed his trick again.

He was supposed to succeed a trick but every time he tried he flagrantly failed in front of the spectators. He was ruining the reputation of the circus and despite all his efforts his father would once again deny him. 

He had a monster pressure on his shoulders and his whole body, it was crushing him but strangely he remained calm.  
He was not as usual, he survived this torture session by imagining that he had come out of his own body. However this technique could not work definitively  
He was alone with himself, in front of all these people. He had to face them under the illuminated eyes of projectors and cameras.He decided to open his eyes.

His gaze was overcome with shame but deep down he wish these laughters turns into a cry of terror, tears and a cry for help.  
Yet he couldn't afford to adopt the sadistic, everyday behavior he had with his competitor, Kedamono.  
He dreamed of staging a massacre but instead he painfully contented himself with accepting his role as a comic relief on the stage.

But Popee, in general, was like a stain on a painting. The painting in question was the place where he lived, the Wolf Zirkus.

The Wolf Zirkus is a bright painting composed of a colorful place: it is a place that is remembered and does not melt away like mere memories. The crystallization of this place in the memories is sometimes because of the unbelieving performances of Marifa, Kedamono and Papi or it is because of the interference that Popee is.

Regarding interference, Popee could have accepted being the ugly duckling of the circus, but the reality was much more complex: in front of the audience he accepted it but behind the scenes it was another story, he violently refused to digest this fact and the only way he could deal with it was to assault those around him and hurt himself.

He thought that was the only way to make himself recognize in the circus and the only way to survive against those who advance him. He thought he was in physical danger in front of his competitors but the only danger here was himself.

Today had been particularly harsh, he had been humiliated by everyone and didn't even have the strength to run his nerves on his family. He didn't even have the strength to be upset.

The only thing he could do in this situation was sleeping to give to his big broken ego a break. He could always take refuge in his sleep, here no member of the public will be there to humiliate him.

Instead of the much-hated public or his relatives he didn't like either, the apple of his eyes was waiting for him.

Eepop in the evening was also abandoned in this dreamlike world, she was wandering alone in an unrealistic circus, when Popee appeared.

It was not the first time they had seen themselves in this situation. Indeed, in their dreams, the worlds met and Popee and Eepop could be together.

Eepop was a fearful, shy, kind person, the complete opposite of Popee. Yet the two could not do without each other, paradoxically because they did not coexist in the same dimensions.

But like an electron and a proton, they inevitably attracted each other beyond all possible logic, they managed to challenge the universe by meeting each other.

Even though they couldn't meet under natural circumstances, they had to meet. Indeed, fate caused Popee to appear on Eepop's path.

But why ?

Even if this question remained unanswered, it didn't bother Popee, on the contrary he especially cherished Eepop and gave it a special place in his heart.

Eepop was like a weaker, more transparent version of him. Deep down, Popee was afraid too, he was afraid of losing what little affection his father could give him, he was afraid of failure. These are things he found it hard to admit to himself, indeed the retrospective was not his forte, but in front of this human mirror he was gently confronted with it and could accept himself and his flaws.

He could project all of his fears and weaknesses into her.

Popee felt he had to protect her, their bond was in that feeling. But also, he could be reassured by his side.

It was the only healthy relationship Popee had yet it was dreamlike.  
With Eepop he could embrace his deepest qualities, he could show him his kindness without feeling humiliated or weak, show her that his anger was not automatic.

He would like to be able to never wake up, give up everything, his job as a clown, his madness for grandeur, Kedamono and his father. But if he doesn't wake up, would that mean he'll die?

He didn't care, if this place was heaven he was ready to die in Morpheus's arms to gain access to it. He was so good with Eepop, here there was no violence, no tantrums, no tears, no hatred.

If only he could die once and for all, he was damned to never die. 

Eepop was only a brief moment, a little respite to get him out of this hell called immortality. If only he could die to join her at last. He deserved to rest.

But his alarm clock rang, it was time to practice and die again in horrible situations. 

During the practice, he had what he thought was a great idea when in reality it was a suicidal ideation. What if he killed himself in this dream with Eepop? Will they finally able to find peace?

Maybe there is an afterlife but can it also appear in dreams?

So many questions, but there was only one way to find out and answer them.

That same evening, Popee fell asleep, he said goodnight to Kedamono and Papi hoping that was the last time he had to tell them that.

This time it was Popee's turn to wait, his alter ego had yet to arrive. When she appeared, Popee couldn't help but show his enthusiasm, he was shaking his striped tail in excitement. But it was an excitement that might seem morbid, he was drawn to the smell of death and the notion of the end. But in reality, he was drawn to rest in peace and live with Eepop forever.

Eepop was also very happy to see him, like Popee she was shaking her blue tail but more timidly she was very embarrassed but Popee did not perceive this since he had only one idea in mind.

They started to talk about their day, Popee knew he couldn't offer her collective suicide directly.

Eepop explained how her day was shitty, she was tormented all day by Onomadek but she hoped one day she would get used to it instead of defending herself.

Popee ended her report of the day with one sentence :

« If we could we wouldn't have to take the pain at all. »

« What are you talking about ? » responded Eepop. 

« I was thinking of maybe trying something together, something who can bring us peace, let’s kill ourselves tonight in this dream. » Popee said, fearless. 

Eepop freaked out, death was the thing she hated the most because it was painful. 

« No, I don’t want to suffer » she screamed in terror, she was afraid deep down that Popee would hurt her, he who had always found himself loving with her.

« No, we don’t have to die in a horrible way this time. », Popee was trying to calm Eepop. 

Popee left Eepop to go to one of the tents. As in the real world, all the objects were in their place except that everything was more blurry and the colors had been changed.

Popee came back with a poison. Eepop didn't need to ask him what it was, she knew it very well.

« We should try to break this damned destiny. » said Popee. 

Eepop basically wanted the same thing, after all they were exactly the same people, and they felt the same way.

For her death has always been a punishment, a torture. But what if this was a reward, an end?

« We should try… but what if we are not together if we finally die, I want to see a different world a place where I can found you. » said Eepop trembling.

« There is only one way to find out. »

At these last words, Eepop understood that it was an invitation to drink this fatal elixir with him, so the two of them complied and drank.

What was happening was surreal, they found themselves sleepy in their own sleep as if a paradox, an inception was being created. But surprisingly even though it might have stressed them out, it made them feel good, their whole muscle relaxed, the poison was very gentle on them and gently beckoned them to leave their own body.

They succeeded. In the morning Kedamono and Onomadek failed to wake Popee and Eepop.

They won’t wake up anymore. 

But did they succeed in their primary objective, namely find each other forever ?

Only they know. 

Eepop deserved to go to Heaven, maybe Popee is in hell ? Maybe they got separated ? Maybe there is nothing after death ? 

But in their last moment they hoped they could hold hands in a real world this time.

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for the few mistakes, I'm not English but I hope it was a good read
> 
> My Twitter if you wanna talk : @spin3l_


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